Sex and eroticism have a series of clear differences between them that can help you in your day to day in the best possible way. Find out what those differences are and how eroticism works at its best.
The question of “what makes us human” has found many answers from evolutionary anthropologists over the past few decades. The answers are grouped in different branches but usually refer to
- Anatomy (walking upright)
- Behavioral patterns (e.g., parenting)
- Mental attitudes (exploratory curiosity).
However, as far as the subjective experience is concerned, the answers remain very vague. And the same is true of eroticism.
What exactly is eroticism?
Eroticism is usually considered a recent reflective concept originating in Western cultures. Eroticism is not sex, but sexuality transformed by human imagination. It is the thoughts, the dreams, the anticipation, the uncontrolled impulses, and even the memories that are part of our sexual and erotic life. Eroticism is influenced by all our human experience, from the first experiences of touch, the first erotic games and even traumas during childhood, which can later become cornerstones of our erotic life.
Difference between eroticism and sex
While animals have sex driven by the procreative impulse, only humans have an erotic life. In other words: sex in humans is transformed and turned into social activity by eroticism. Sexologist Esther Perel describes some basic ideas about what eroticism is:
- An expression of individual/personal freedom and sovereignty
- The cultivation of pleasure for one’s own personal good.
- The ability to capture and/or maintain life, vitality and energy through sex.
- The reconnection with attitudes of renewal, of play, of vitality, of curiosity, of mystery.
According to Perel, eroticism in addition:
- It is fed by our creativity and imagination.
- It involves exploration and going beyond our usual boundaries.
- Embrace novelty, and novelty in this context is about who you want to bring into that experience.
Such concepts of what constitutes eroticism are certainly far from the usual ingredients suggested to spice up people’s sex lives, such as trying new positions, finding the G or P point, using sex toys or what we recommend, erotic massages to stimulate eroticism and make us feel better.
Why should we be more erotic?
Eroticism teaches us to be more open, receptive and willing to open our minds to novelty. Eroticism teaches us that it is not about saying yes or no to everything, but it is about being willing to be influenced, receptive, curious. When we are closed to eroticism for a prolonged period of time we do not feel open or receptive. We want others to make us want to, but it doesn’t work that way, quite the opposite: desire is something that belongs to us completely and no one can make us want to except ourselves.
With this, the different practices of eroticism will help us in our daily life to face any task with energy. Therefore, tantric massage is the option we recommend in order to improve our experiences at the erotic level.